In Manitoba, popular bullies live a life of privilege. They have advantages and are given concessions that bully victims can only dream of.  From the community, to the play ground, to the school, in the workforce and everything in-between, bullies have first choice and are able to drive out anyone they don’t approve of. Bullies usually surround themselves with cohorts and in most cases, it becomes impossible to distinguish the bully from their close cohorts. This is done intentionally. By keeping an entourage of supporters around themselves, the bully can spread the blame for anything they do and frequently, the head bully does get others to attack. By doing so the bully can paint the victim as the problem by saying the victim can’t get along with anyone. This makes the bully look much better than the victim. Authorities, who base their decisions on the volume of testimonies instead of the quality of testimony, will immediately side with the bully.

 Bullies take full advantage of this treatment and, at the taxpayer’s expense, utilize everything made available to them. Bullies will enjoy school, ride the school bus, enter school sports, join clubs after school, play in playgrounds and just walk the streets freely. The same option is available to the victim, but the victim knows that they are in danger if they are caught by the bullies when no one is watching, that’s why the bully victim will usually become a prisoner in their own home. The government is quite happy about this, from their point of view, the bully problem has stopped. The victim isn’t complaining and the bully has stopped attacking all is right with the world. Should the victim try to get help from the government at this point, the government will probably launch a fake investigation designed to put the victim in place. The investigator won’t make any effort to find bullying and any information provided that supports the bullying claim is quickly and quietly discarded. Our government’s goal is to stop the bully complaints, not to stop the bullying. By doing so, our government creates second class Manitoba citizen. 

 We now know that bullies are popular and well liked, but how did they get this way? What did they do to achieve such status?

 To answer this, I will give you 4 examples at different ages to provide you with an idea. Since most children learn to bully by the age of 3, that will be the first.

 Bill is a small boy age 2 at a daycare. Bill is surrounded by 9 other kids, Vic another 2 yr old,  2-3 year olds, Jim and Susan, a 7 & 8 yr old named Sally and Pete, 3- 10 yr olds and an 11 yr old. While at the daycare, Bill got bored and starts looking for something to do. The daycare owners aren’t present, but he notices how the 4 oldest boys are laughing and having fun. He goes over and sees that they are having fun by calling Pete names, pushing him and knocking him down. Every time they did something, all of them would laugh. Even Sally thought it was funny and kept saying “do it again”. Bill sees this and decides to try it so he goes to Vic and knocks him to the ground and calls him names. Vic was hurt, but then Jim and Susan laughed. Bill thought this was great, he was getting attention, so as Vic was getting up; he knocked him down again, pointed at him and called him stupid. Suddenly both Jim and Susan joined Bill and all three were laughing and pointing at Vic. Vic was upset and walked away, but Bill followed him. He came up behind Vic and dumped a handful of dirt down his back, now Bill, Jim and Susan were wildly laughing. Bill thought it was great. Just by picking on this kid, he became popular. This scene would play out over and over again and with time Bill soon found himself surrounded by friends who wanted to be there the next time Vic was attacked. None of the kid thought there was anything wrong with what Bill was doing and soon Jim and Susan joined in. All three took turns doing thing to Vic.  The other kids at the daycare came over and watched. They laughed every time Bill did something to Vic. Vic cried frequently at the daycare so Vic’s parents approached the daycare owner and complained about the attacks.  Since Vic was the only one complaining, everyone blamed him for the things that were happening. The daycare owner, not wanting to upset the parents of all the kids having fun, also blamed Vic. Vic was accused of not getting along with the other kids. The daycare owners said the Vic caused his own grief and shouldn’t be blaming the other kids. After Vic’s parents left, all the kids were very angry at Vic. They ignored him, called him names and threatened to beat him if he said anything again. Eventually, Vic’s parents moved Vic to a different daycare and Vic was much better.

Lessons Learned: Vic and the kids watching learned that even when you are the victim, you will be the one punished. Bill and his supporters learned that bullying is ok and that as long as you have lots of others backing your story, you can do anything you want and get away with it.

 Bill is now 10 and has had 8 successful years of bullying. He has made many mistakes, learned many things and has received lots of help. Bill is an expert bully and could not be such a successful bully on his own and he knows it. Bill is in school now, but he is still at the daycare as well, all the older kids are gone and Bill rules both the school and daycare. The technique used when he was 2 hasn’t changed much. He still knows that you only select one target and only one target. More than one could cause grief should they meet and get together to report him. Tim is Bill’s new victim. Bill has worked hard at bullying Tim. He calls him names puts him down, humiliates him constantly, but he doesn’t do it alone. He tells his friends that Tim is strange and does strange things. He says that Tim is mental, has problems going to the bathroom, and wears strange cloths. He tells them that Tim is secretly violent and has hurt people. He even tells people that Tim and his family worship the devil just to get teachers, parents and other adults to join in.

 Bill beats Tim all the time, but gets his friends to say Tim attacked Bill so the school makes Tim apologize to Bill. Bill is an excellent student, does will in class, is a star athlete, has lots of friends and has joined almost every sports team the school has. He rides the school bus to and from school and always acts like a perfect gentleman in front of the school staff which makes the staff hate Tim even more. Tim calls Bill a liar and says Bill and his friends are the only one doing the hitting and has the bruises to prove it. Tim then asks Bill to show his bruises. Bill quickly tells everyone the he can’t show the bruises because Tim hit him between the legs and he is too embarrassed to show that. Bills friends tell the staff that Tim only has bruises from Bill defending himself and that Tim is always attacking Bill for no reason. Bill’s friends also attack Tim and then tell the staff that Tim attacked them and that Tim must be sick in the head because he is always going after someone. Tim is always injured, his school work is always damages or stolen, his cloths are always dirty and torn and Tim is always crying and yet, everyone believes the bullies because there simply are more of them and they are backing each others story. Tim is eventually pulled out of school and home schooled to keep him safe. Bill tells the rest of the kids “let that be a lesson to you, cross me and the same will happen to you”.

Lessons Learned: Tim and the kids watching learned that victims are hated and telling on a bully will get you in trouble not the bully, you will be the one punished. Bill and his supporters learned that bullies get preferential treatment as long as they stick together and that the authorities will always believe a bully regardless of the proof as long as they have lots of other kids backing their story, bullies can do anything they want and get away with it.

Bill is now an adult at work he is very incompetent, but thanks to his decades of bullying has lots of confidence. He knows how to lie and blame others for his mistakes. He has no moral fiber and uses his friends and other employees to get ahead. It doesn’t take long for some employees to see what Bill is doing and join up with him hoping that they can benefit from Bill’s popularity. Bill isn’t a leader, he is a boss and he is always critical of his staff and takes credit for their work. To keep his staff in line, Bill selects one employee to bully.  Sam is the best worker in the company and well liked by everyone. Sam was being considered for promotion by the senior management and was a threat to Bill’s dominance. Sam is the one Bill selected. He puts Sam down, calls him names, criticizes him for every little mistake and gives him bad appraisals. The other employees abandon Sam for fear that Bill will attack them too. Sam has a wife and kids, but Bill doesn’t care. He enjoys the fear he instill in the rest of the employees and uses it to keep them in line. Sam complains to senior management about the poor treatment, but when senior managers investigate, no employee comes forward to back Sam. They all say nothing is wrong and that Sam is just over reacting. Sam eventually gets sick from all the stress. Bill uses the time Sam is away from work to further condemn Sam. Bill says Sam isn’t reliable, does poor work and isn’t good for the company. Bill eventually fires Sam saying he just doesn’t fit into the company’s culture. Bill then tells the rest of the staff “let that be a lesson to you, cross me and the same will happen to you”.

Lessons Learned: Sam and the employees learned that the best way to get ahead is by lying, cheating and threatening. Reporting the bullying will get you not the bully fired, you will be the one punished. Bill and his supporters learned that bullies get preferential treatment and promotions as long as they stick together and that the senior managers will always believe a manager regardless of the proof as long as they have other staff backing their story, bullies can do anything they want and get away with it.

Bill and Lynn decide to run a daycare. They move onto a residential street that is nice and quiet. Both Bill and Lynn are serial bullies and have bullied all their lives. They love the control running a daycare gives them as they can intimidate parents and their children. The shortage of daycare space plays into their hands as the government turns a blind eye to problems to protect political interests. Bill and Lynn have a successful history of intimidating and acting hostile toward anyone that stood in their way and arbitrarily chose a neighbor to disrespect in order to teach the rest of the neighbors a lesson. They learned long ago that people will simply sit idly by and do nothing to help the victim. Parents in the neighborhood know the couple and the type of daycare that is run and take their children to the daycare to teach them how to bully. Many parents know that bullies will live a privileged life and want their children to be part of it. Living next to the daycare is a family with an 8 year old boy named Jerry. The daycare has 4 older boys. The older boys use Jerry to practice bullying. They have lots of fun as they go over and call Jerry names, tease him, threaten and smash his toys. The daycare owners care nothing about the rules and encourage the bullying by telling the boys they can go anywhere they want and do anything they want as long as it is on public property or daycare property. Both Bill and Lynn tell the customers that the street is for them to use and that they don’t have to respect the neighbor’s rights as there is no one that will protect those rights.

 When the neighbor’s complain to the government, Bill and Lynn together with the customers deny everything. They say their daycare is invisible and is causing no problems. The neighbors produce pictures of the bullies as they stalked Jerry. Instead of apologizing, Bill and Lynn become furious as do the customer. They say that their daycare is one of many illegal daycares in the community; they say that everyone is bullying and if they shut one down they might as well shut them all down. The government agrees and lets them continue to operate. The government then condemns the victim and family for complaining.

 Bill and Lynn have been running the daycare for many years. They contact their present customers and their past customer and tell them what the neighbor’s have done and ask for help getting revenge. Bill and Lynn tell the customer that the neighbors are taking pictures so any attacks will have to be done at night or somewhere else. The customers tell Bill and Lynn that their kids go to the same school as Jerry and that Jerry won’t have his parents there to protect him. Suddenly Jerry is viciously attacked at school by kids he never knew. Strangers suddenly hated him and kept telling him he needed to be taught a lesson. Jerry was attacked by children and adults. Many adults involved with the school also had their kids looked after by the daycare so they wanted to help the daycare. Even the school bus driver hated Jerry now and changed his drop off point to make sure he was in great danger from both the bully and the bully’s parents. Jerry was tortured without mercy. At school he was humiliated, threatened, beaten, had his cloths and school work destroyed. Everywhere he went he faced hatred. Even at home the bullying didn’t stop. Supporters of the daycare would glare and stare at Jerry. Neighbors would yell at him and threaten him. Eventually Jerry was severely beaten. The beating took place in front of both adults and children, but no one admitted to seeing anything. Jerry never returned to school. His home was vandalized, toys stolen, and he could no longer leave his own house. The bullies had successfully punished Jerry and his family for reporting the bullying.

Lessons Learned: Jerry, his parents and the neighborhood learned that the best way to get ahead is by lying, cheating and threatening. Reporting the bullying will get you not the bully in trouble, you will be the one punished and may lose your life. Bill and Lynn and the supporters already knew that bullies get preferential treatment and as long as they stick together, the government will always believe the bullies regardless of the proof. Bullies know that long as they have others backing their story, bullies can do anything they want and get away with it.